Re: fake news and the SFBA newsletter

From: sdubois@Advent.COM-DeleteThis
Date: Mon Aug 21 1995 - 07:52:15 PDT


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Date: Mon, 21 Aug 95 06:52:15 PST
From: sdubois@Advent.COM-DeleteThis
Message-Id: <9507218090.AA809041771@smtp_out.advent.com-DeleteThis>
To: wind_talk@opus.hpl.hp.com-DeleteThis
Subject: Re: fake news and the SFBA newsletter


     
     I found the letter when I came home last nighht and I laughed
     compulsively for quite a while...
     
     Unfortunately Jerome (and Luigi, it's "Labat" for you, not "Lablatte")
     is up in the Gorge racing for the next two weeks so he will not be
     given the opportunity to enjoy the latest outcome of Luigi's sick but
     oh funny imagination.
     
     For those who don't know, Jerome (one of the best speed sailors in the
     Bay) must have mentioned a looong time ago that using the salt ponds
     for speed sailing would be kinda cool (they have artificial speed
     sailing sites shaped like that in France). It obviously did not fall
     into a deaf ear and years later, Luigi turned in into a now memorable
     scam.
     
     I was surprised to never see any followup to Luigi's posting of the
     article (like a disclaimer from the author). Many must have believed
     it. I did believe it for 5 minutes until I called Jerome to let him
     know. He was first confused about what I was talking about. Then I
     told him Luigi had forwarded the article... Then he said "there you
     go..."
     
     I think a followup article on the aerodynamic properties of egret
     guano on race sails is in order...
     And I will continue sponsoring the SFBA... they'll need it.
     
     - Stephane
     

______________________________ Reply Separator _________________________________
Subject: fake news and the SFBA newsletter
Author: wind_talk@opus.hpl.hp.com-DeleteThis at Internet
Date: 8/20/95 12:35 PM

OK folks,
     
I still have a faint hope that this is an elaborate and quite
effective joke at my expenses.
     
My copy of the SFBA newsletter, which I got yesterday, contains
a front-page article titled `Salt Ponds Convert to Sailing Sites.'
The article is a fake. I wrote it on 7/1 and sent it to this
mailing list. To give it a modicum of credibility, I pretended
it came from a respectable newspaper (the San Jose Mercury News),
which I don't even read.
     
If nobody else has seen this in their newsletter, then I have to
bow to a truly splendid joke. However, I doubt I am worthy of
so much attention, not to mention work. If it was indeed sent
to everybody, then I am very sorry.
     
In the latter case, I can suggest two courses of action to the SFBA:
     
1. slithering apologies. Here's a suggestion for the wording:
     
`We are sorry. The article `Salt Ponds etc.' in our August
newsletter was not published in the SJMN, as stated, but it
was a product of the fertile imagination of Luigi Semenzato.
We admit we are complete doofuses for reprinting an article
without first checking its source, and we apologize to all
our members, and in particular to Luigi Semenzato for using
his copyrighted material without permission.'
     
2. cover up. Here's a follow-up article which will put the
issue to rest.
     
>From the Union City Gazette, 8/20/1995
     
Salt Pond Windsurfing Deal Falls Through
     
Pacific Salt Company's plans for creating a windsurfing mecca at the
mineral evaporation ponds in Union City suffered a major blow today,
as Larry Falk, a researcher at the University of Santa Clara,
published a technical report declaring the ponds `environmentally
unsuitable for high-speed sailing activities.' Falk produced the
report after witnessing Jerome LaBlatte's attempt to break the world
sailing speed record at the site. LaBlatte sailed into a landing
flock of egrets, causing havoc and panic among them. Because of the
stress, the flock apparently moved out of the ponds before they could
feed properly. In a possibly related development, several Napa Valley
wineries have reported to local authorities that a large number of
egrets are eating their grapes.
     
Martin Fisher of the Pacific Salt Company stated he is `surprised and
disappointed by the finding, especially considering we had financed
Falk's research. Scientists in such positions should be a bit more
sensible about their results.'
     
Lablatte was also disappointed, but admitted that `it wasn't going to
work anyhow. We windsurfers spend enough time as it is rigging and
unrigging and fixing and cleaning. It certainly doesn't help if you
have to spend an extra hour removing egret guano from your sail.'



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